An annual tradition celebrating “the best of Smallville” became a festival of horrors at the Superman & Lois Spring Finale, which ended with another stunning detail about the backstory of Captain Luthor.
The super couple’s problems began when Sharon Powell’s son Derek mysteriously returned home unaware of the voicemail he allegedly had sent to his mother. Lois and Chrissy could tell that something was wrong with his story, but Sharon insisted there was nothing further to investigate … which is literally the worst way to get a journalist off your dick. When a fire suddenly broke out in the community center (spoiler alert: Derek lost control of his newly acquired laser vision!), The Smallville Gazette’s best / only reporting team took action.
But while she was busy keeping an eye on Morgan Edge’s newest X-Kryptonite soldier, Lois was unaware that another interested party was on her trail – Captain Luthor! (I know he’s the “bad guy” or whatever, but honestly I was just glad to see him again.) As a LuthorCorp employee who turned into a Reuters technology reporter, he approached Lois and offered her started throwing more dirt on her Morgan Edge pile, one she encountered with her usual mix of intrigue and suspicion.
Meanwhile, Chrissy caught Derek doing business with Leslie Larr outside of a shady Edge-owned facility (and I mean biz-wet). According to her personal mantra (WWLD, aka “What Would Lois Do?”), Chrissy followed them into the building just in time to see her put him in a mysterious machine – rather than the funny Scooby-Doo way . Then Superman finally reported to the party and chased an energetic Derek across various grain fields until they were both shot from the sky by Captain Luthor.
“He raised me from the dead, Kal-El!” Derek told Supes. “You are not alone anymore!” But before he could tell Clark what that meant, Derek announced, “I’m already dead!” and then exploded. (RIP!) When Captain Luthor caught up with the wreck, his target had flown from the stable.
As always, this week’s episode also gave us a healthy helping of teen drama, from Jordan and Sarah going on their first (and last?) Date until Jonathan was dumped by Eliza (over the phone, no less!). In his grief, Jonathan turned into a drunken tornado of misery by first telling his father he wanted to go back to Metropolis (“This city is my kryptonite!”), Then by crashing Jordan’s date and molesting Sarah. She wasn’t thrilled that Jordan immediately took his brother’s side over hers, but she agreed to still be his girlfriend – so there’s a silver lining to you.
Clark’s conflict with Jonathan inspired flashbacks to his final days in Smallville, when he apparently had similar clashes with his mother. (“I wasn’t sent here to be Martha Kent’s son!” He said once when she tried to stop him from taking to the streets as a masked vigilante.) Clark admitted he regretted the house leaving the way he did, so he offered Jonathan a one-time get out of jail card in exchange for his son, who agreed to give Smallville another chance.
But before we had time to fully process Clark’s questionable parenting, we learned another twisted truth about Captain Luthor. When his computer reminded him that the Lois of this world has nothing to do with his own Lois, he replied angrily: “Everything about her is the same. Everything except that she married someone else! “That’s right, CL and LL are man and woman in his world. Yeah hit the ground.
In all honesty, I’m still so focused on this Lane Luthor reveal that I don’t have to worry about Tag attacking Jordan in the woods in the final moments of the episode. He’ll be fine.
Your thoughts on the spring finale of Superman & Lois? (New episodes resume on Tuesday, May 18 at 9 / 8c. In the meantime, The CW will air the first half of Supergirl’s final season in the same time slot.) Rate the episode and leave a comment with your hopes for the show’s return.